Victimhood: Believing your job is solely an outside-in experience.

Wednesday, I got a call from Laura at a NYC bank. "I hate my job so Im quitting", she said. "It's been two years of hell, so many weekends, no bonus. My boss has no empathy and constantly corrects my work. She never trained me. The team members I inherited are awful. She won't let me fire them. The whole place is just crazy.

"What are you going to do?"

"I've got another offer. I'm going to go to her boss and complain, then I'm going to tell her how bad she is. Then I'm out of here."

"Before you go, drop a gratitude bomb for me."

(Laura's a victim of an organization filled with criticism, backbiting, gossip, and dog-eat-dog behaviors. It's the competitive business culture on steroids. Is it Laura's fault that her own spirit has become so corroded? Who knows, but she needed to get out of victim mode if she was going to navigate a successful exit. And nothing turns victimhood into self-confidence better than dropping a gratitude bomb.)

"Okay, what's a gratitude bomb?" she asked.

"It's where you realize you can't be controlled by everyone else. You stop reacting to other people's negative attitudes and start thanking them for the things that have helped you. You thank a bunch of them in quick succession and see how you feel. Before you snitch on your boss, try making a list of people with whom you work and make a point of thanking them in the next few days. Try to be specific about how each has helped you. After you leave, they'll remember you for something much better than snitching. Their spirit will be lifted by the memory of helping you."

Friday, I got a text. Mission accomplished, bomb dropped. Never realized how much they appreciated me. Thanked my boss 2. Had no idea the pressure she was under. What's the opposite of gratitude bomb for joining a new company?

"Another gratitude bomb," I texted back.

Is a gratitude bomb only for leaving or joining? Drop one this week and see!

Stephen
ANE = Calm, Confident, Connected Leadership

PS: Hear A New Equilibrium on the radio last week 30-min cut, 1-hour cut